Upcoming deployments and missing my hubby

finally, the blogger is fixed! not much has been happening as far as my journey with the kids on gaining grateful hearts. its still a daily struggle that I'm trying to have patience with. my whole body cringes when i hear them asking for a new toy or some snack when we are at the store or are watching t.v. i know its going to happen, but it still makes me feel like I'm failing. or that all my hard work is for nothing.


This week HA will be out of town. which happens often with his military career. but for some reason the kids are all taking this one harder than other times. i think that it struck me odd because this time i did not have a a problem with him leaving. i felt that i had prepared myself way ahead of time so that i would not feel overwhelmed while he is gone. of course other things still come up and i find myself having to do extra things (like i forgot to tell a friend that i put her on the list for that day to bring dinner to another friend in our small group who just had a baby. so because i didn't give her enough notice i had to run to the store, grab a frozen dinner meal, make it, load the kids up and drive it to her house. it was completely my fault for not being organized about it) and always will.


which of course leads me to thinking about our upcoming deployment. that stress can really drain your energy. we've been through it twice but i think this time will be the hardest. how can anyone live this kind of life without Christ is beyond me! i wake up daily seeking guidance and peace from our Maker.


I'm privileged to know several military wives who are currently going through deployments. I'm so blessed to see how God can use even separation from a loved one to better us. i know God has a purpose and I'm excited to see how this helps our family to grow. so right now, i choose to focus on that instead of the "scary stuff" that is ahead for our family.
God is so good, and his love endures forever. AMEN!

The start of The Great Toy Purge

Here we are going through all the kids toys. As you can see, we have a bin for each child. the toys tend to get mixed up as the days go on, in the rush of cleaning up. so i piled them on the living room floor and we took about an hour to go through them all. i asked the kids to give me a toy to donate for every toy they wanted to keep. it was amazing how they got into the spirit and were willing to part with some of their things.

Fastforward to today: They are now starting to earn back their toys that have been in our garage for 3 weeks now. They understand that they really have to earn them back. I'm seeing an attitude change with them too. Mostly Monkey has changed. He has been working hard with whatever chore i ask him to do to earn his beloved toys back. He's taking much better care of them and reminds me from time to time what he did to earn the toys back. Also, his prayers at dinner have become longer and more thankful. He still prays to have his toys back of course. But he's being thankful for his family among other things.

Drama... not so much. She has become willing to pray. And she does say that she is thankful. But right now she could care less about earning toys back. I'm not sure if its a stubborn thing or she just realized she doesn't really need them to have fun.

And Bug is along for the ride. every time one of the kids gets a toy back so does Bug. He's at the stage where he is just happy to play with any one's toys. He does absolutely loves his tools though. And that can't be more adorable!

We will continue our journey of Grateful Hearts because it is never really done. I'm still needing to learn it in some areas too.

There is a great song on the Christian radio station these days that talks about how God uses the small annoyances in our day to teach us patience and His Love. my kids have learned that song and we sing along with the radio. so today I'm thankful for Christian Radio Stations that help teach my kids and myself to have Grateful Hearts.

Operational Definitions of Character Qualities

I LOOOVE the TLC reality show about the Duggar Family! I love that they have 19 kids and all of them are sane, normal children (so far). they have such a gift of generosity. i truly believe that the example that both of the parents set (Jim-Bob and Michelle Duggar) is why the kids have so easily followed in their footsteps. I enjoy their thriftiness, modesty, and their willingness to show that this is how they are and they are not going to change. i think the most that has changed since the beginning of the series is the girls hair. but they are still very Conservative. side-thought: i wonder how many of the boys will grow up to join the military. i wouldn't be surprised since they are a very service hearted family.

i want to grow all these character qualities in my children as well. and because we have a much smaller family (less positive examples for the little ones to see) and we do not home school our children, i think the "world-view" is seen through my children's eyes a ton more than the "Christ-centered-view" that I'd prefer them to be seeing. so by whatever means necessary I will take every step I can to teach my children positive character qualities. that's why I thought this chart was so awesome. i found it on the Duggar Family website. i printed it out and will be putting it into a lovely frame to be hung in our hallway. it has the positive character quality vs. the negative opposite, the definition and a verse to go with all 49 Character Qualities and here is the chart on the website for you to print out as well.

http://www.duggarfamily.com/characterqualities.html by the way the chart says that the opposite of gratefulness is unthankfulness. the definition is "Making known to God and others in what ways they have benefited my life" and the verse they used is 1 Corinthians 4:7

Donating

The kids have been doing really good with having no toys (again they do have books, puzzles, games and Lego's). however, now Monkey is praying at dinner to bless the food and have God bring his toys back. Heavily Armed and i could not help but laugh at that one. Drama and i went through her dresser and pulled out all the clothing that she had out grown. we filled up a trash bag! and now she can shut her drawers all the way. i was going to drop it off at a thrift store but luckily i ran into a friend who could take them off my hands. it also gave Drama the opportunity to see who the clothing was going to specifically. she was so happy to give it away! i was proud of her for her service attitude. we also went to the fair this past weekend and to my surprise and thankfulness none of the kids asked for anything! it helped that the second we got their we set down some ground rules. they were not going to be getting any toys. they were allowed to ride 3 rides each. no fits, no matter what. they commented on all the character balloons that we passed by and looked wide eyed at all the carnival ride options. it was a very very fun family time. and i was so happy that when we left there was no sadness. i also set the same rules for myself. so i didn't get a cinnamon roll or lemonade like i was secretly wanting. luckily for me i had a bag of lemons at home. so we rewarded ourselves with making homemade lemonade when we got home from the fair. i was so grateful to have that time with the family. i didn't need to spoil my kids and i didn't need to spoil myself. and for that, homemade lemonade was a perfect reward for us all! we are still working on the same bible verse. i want them to memorize it and keep it in their hearts forever.

definition of NEED

today i talked with the kids about what we really NEED. a need is something we can not live without. the kids on their own came up with these two lists... we NEED: healthy food, one shirt and one pair of pants, one pair of shoes, one pair of socks, water to drink and bathe in, and we need shelter (like a tent) in case it rains. we do NOT NEED: TV, movies, ice cream, toys, clothes that have characters on it, bedding that has characters on it, 2 bathrooms in a house, a back yard, candy. i thought that was a pretty good list that they came up with all on their own. it was a short lesson but a good one. they seem to be grasping the fact that we do have more than we need and that is something to thank God for. on a personal note. i thanked God for great wind and kites. I've really been enjoying this weather right now and we have a rinky-dink kite that I've been toting everywhere. its been getting a lot of use lately. i really enjoy flying a kite and would not have known that about myself had i not had kids. so thank you Lord for kites.

Grateful Hearts Project Day 2 "grace"

Since being an adult i have wrestled with the idea of praying over meals. i always thought it was a ritual and God didn't actually hear it unless you meant it. so "rub-a-dub-dub thanks for the grub" wasn't going to matter. i never bothered to make it a routine to say grace at the dinner table even though that's what i grew up with. my children hear me pray throughout the day. i thought i was still teaching my kids that prayer was important and knew they understood you can pray at any time. one example: i was driving with my kids to my parents house 4 hours away. i was having a nice conversation with Drama about insects. i told her that each insect has a job just like humans do. Bee's make honey, etc. she asked me what a spider's job was. and i told her i couldn't remember. she said "you should pray to God and ask Him for the answer then". so that's exactly what i did. and of course i was able to remember that spiders trap and eat the flies so we don't have an over population of flies. Thank you God. i was super excited that Drama was grasping the idea that you can pray to our Lord for anything at anytime. but i did not stop to tell Him thank you. i do thank God for different things throughout the day and sometimes say it out loud. but the majority of my thankful words come when the children are not around. maybe because its easier to hear myself think when they aren't around! of course, when i start any "journey" with God i ask for his guidance and wisdom. i was blown away how quickly and clearly He spoke to me on this subject. i could go on for days, and i will! the biggest thing He asked me to reevaluate is meal prayers. so that is our next step. i will be diligent about saying "grace" at each meal and making that part of our prayer life as a family. not out of a routine. but to teach my kids to always have a grateful heart for all the blessings, especially the food we eat, that we are given each day. PS- the no-toy idea hasn't stopped their creativity. Heavily Armed asked me yesterday after coming home from work if the house was easier to keep clean since there are no toys to pick up. the answer is no. they turned their blankets and pillows into all kids of creative things. they are turning lemons into lemonade! and learning of what they really NEED and don't need. Thank you Lord for your Love and your wisdom and taking the time to help me raise children with grateful hearts.

sorry its sideways! can't figure out how to change it. this is day 1 activity for what i am now calling "Grateful Hearts Project". i think you can tell whos is who.

Grateful kids step 1

lately my heart has been grieved by the way my children have been not as thankful and very much "gimme, gimme". i know that they are only 5, 3, and 1.5. however, the first 5 years is the most crucial in teaching our children their core values and morals. so i decided that i need to change their ungrateful hearts and do it FAST. so after speaking with my husband, we decided to take all the kids toys away. yup, ALL the toys. even poor Bug had to have his taken away (or the other 2 would just play with his toys). we left mega blocks, puzzles, and books. their rooms look really clean! we had a family meeting telling them why we were taking their toys away and that after a while they could start earning them back. Drama was the one who had the most to say about our decision. go figure! she cried and said "you've made me very sad!" not only will we take their toys away but i will be doing daily activities with them to drive home the subject and adding a bible verse in there of course! 1 Chronicles 16:34 "Oh, give thanks to the Lord, for He is good!" seemed like the most obvious choice. so today i typed up the verse in the middle of a blank page and my kids will be cutting out pictures from magazines or drawing what they are thankful for. we will put them up on their walls in their rooms so they can continue to look at them through our "grateful hearts journey" if you'd like to print this out for your own children, let me know and i will send it to you.

take two...

so much is going on and i want to take time to journal it out and share with people who care to hear about it. i am now officially an army sniper wife! so proud of my husband. concerned about the future of course. but excited too. i have a new ministry starting at church for military and deployed families (we say it that way because we have several members who have gone overseas as civilian contractors). and of course my children are growing up faster every day! so i will try AGAIN to keep up with a blog. hopefully this attempt sticks. stay tuned....